Bangers & Mash

-

 

Pictured, Boris Johnson at the standards committee this afternoon. Note the suitably fried appearance of his fleshy face, after facing some of his former allies and Harriet Harman in a vain attempt to bluster his way out of trouble, by utilizing the Old Etonian tactic of assuming everyone else subscribes to your innate sense of superiority over them. A pretty sight it weren't, but at least he'd had the foresight to tame his coiffeur in advance of the meeting. If, however, he were facing the death penalty on a charge of murder, his performance this afternoon would have seen him dangling from the gibbet within days. If his former housemaster is still alive, I would guess that he would have witnessed this kind of thing from his young charge many a time, and administered the appropriate punishment, accordingly.

A more transparent and squirming exhibition of 'It wasn't me, guv; it was the rest of 'em did it', is difficult to imagine. A schoolboy caught smoking in the bike sheds claiming he was 'poorly advised' by his mates to spark up. Guilty as charged, your honour: and, speaking of honour; if the toad had the slightest shred of decency, he would retire to his study with a pearl-handled revolver proffered by his peers and do the honourable 'thing'. Oh, bugger, wrong picture, that was my dinner. Much like that plate of bangers and mash, though, I hope also that Johnson's political career is now history. Please don't shirk this one, guys, common decency demands you do the right thing, for once...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Of Feedback & Wobbles

-
Image
Many years ago I came up with an analogy for poorly damped feedback loops. The feedback loop that prompted this frankly tart analogy was indeed a horror. Anyone who remembers shame-faced their first attempts at clutch control resulting in the good old kangaroo launch across the lights only to stall in the middle of the crossroads will have some idea of the kind of data transfer lag involved in said system. The analogy I made was that of a large blancmange. Untouched, a model of stasis and eminently stable and predictable; but prod the bugger and the resultant chaotic behaviour needs a very complex physical model and some very decent computing horsepower to predict its outputs, if at all. The system in question was a large and complex audio-visual display at what eventually became 'The Electric Mountain' in Llanberis. We were ultimately contracted to maintain the thing having been witness to and peripherally involved in its installation. Certainly not involved in its des...
Read more

A Time of Connection

-
Image
I was just reflecting on the vacuum of continuity that's left behind when someone dies: that sudden sense of disjoint, of fracture, in one's personal history that takes one completely by surprise at the oddest moments. These pinch-points in memory can often yield some surprising revelations of fact about periods in one's past. One such occurred to me tonight, tending my rather lazy meal of pizza in its journey from shrink-wrap to mouth via the oven. Al's recent demise still catches me out from time to time: the space he left bounded by forty plus years of friendship. But the thing that struck me tonight was just how much change was happening on a personal and social level in the very early years of our acquaintance. Between moving here from Birmingham in September 1980 and our buying our first proper house eighteen months later, all manner of things occurred that would chart the course of our lives to the present day. At around the time of our meeting Alan & Irene [...
Read more

Sister Ray

-
Image
Ray Keats - aka Ann Key - local artist & family friend, died this morning. She'd been ill for some years, but never let it get in the way of her work or of tending to the massive network of friends, colleagues and fans she had accumulated over the decades. Her house on the High Street of Rachub, just below where we live - a former cockle factory(!) - bought many years ago when she and her late husband Ronald moved here from Manchester to set up home in Yr Achub, is currently still home to her paintings and drawings, and the front window displays her work, including the last drawing she made in hospital, just days before she died. Her good friend Colin has been a diamond in her latter years, looking out for her and just being there when she needed him. She will be much missed by this tiny community of ageing bohemians up here in the hills, but suffice it to say, George, her cat, will be well looked after now she's gone.
Read more